When we HSPs form relationships with people, we throw ourselves wholeheartedly into them. It means we get to experience the most incredible connections with people. But, on the flip side, it means the feeling of rejection is common and we often feel our relationships are one-sided. This is especially prominent in relationships (of all kinds) between HSPs and Narcissists.

My main emotion when dealing with a narcissist is confusion and due to this, curiosity. In most cases, I try to be rational - analyse the situation and deal with it like a normal, sensitive human being. But, the narcissistic mind confuses me and for that reason, I'd like to pose a few questions from the HSPs to the Narcissists...

N.B: Completely out of my own opinionated curiosity and in an intentionally unoffensive way.

Why don't you care?

That's my main one. Empathy is such a key trait in many HSPs and thus we can easily understand what the other person is feeling and relate to them. We make great listeners and trusted, loyal friends. So, we're often checking up on others with a quick text to say "How are you feeling?" But, over the past few years of being around narcissism, I have found that I am always the first one to initiate a conversation. To me, this comes across as someone who doesn't really care about me. Do you?

Is there a reason you seem to fear the word "Sorry"? This might not be true for all, but in my experience, a narcissist won't apologise without concrete proof that they're in the wrong. And even then they'll loathe you for making them say the 'S-word'. From an HSP's perspective, I cannot think of anything worse than accidentally offending someone. So, when someone is offended by your actions or, more often than not, your words, why do you so often respond with something like "Not my problem"? Isn't it just good manners to apologise?

Opening up, revealing secrets. We HSPs are all about over-sharing. Yes, it sometimes leads to hurt but can you really put blame on us for sharing something in confidence, only to find that the confident has decided it should be public knowledge? Is the idea that you want to prevent that from happening in the first place? Do you have trust issues? What is it that means you won't open up to us?

It's not a bad thing to cry. It's why we have tear ducts. And it can't be good to build up so much emotion, can it? In my mind, this is such an impossible concept. I have to let a few tears slip every so often, just to stay sane! I have known narcissists to get defensive at the very mention of the word "upset". A narcissist's face is a mask and I find them near impossible to read. My question is, how do you keep your emotions so under control?